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#177476 - 04/10/02 05:11 PM Comments: Pocket Lint
Aerm1 Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 04/11/01
Posts: 1495
Loc: KY, USA
Okay, Wendy. You know how I feel about first person. ( I still feel that way.) But this definitely needed to be in first person, and it was a very nice scene.

Love the insults.

Ann

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#177477 - 04/10/02 05:21 PM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
TerriAnn Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 04/13/01
Posts: 218
Loc: Nashville, Tennessee USA
Wendy,
That's quite an imaginative list of insults you have there! I think "He's an animated lump of gangrene." is my favorite!

I really like the way you changed gears to make the reader be eavesdropping on them in the last half. Very funny.

TerriAnn
_________________________
If everyone thinks alike, then someone isn't thinking.

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#177478 - 04/10/02 05:41 PM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
Karen Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 08/16/01
Posts: 324
Loc: Charlotte, NC
LOL, great story. Definately funny, and I like how you did the first person talking to the reader.
_________________________
Why not have your cake and eat it too -- it's cake, what else are you going to do with it?

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#177479 - 04/10/02 05:50 PM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
AMCiotola Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 04/11/01
Posts: 137
Loc: Pennsylvania
LOL, Wendy, fabulous!!!

Always full of fanfic surprises!!!

Thanks for sharing smile
_________________________
Anne wink
http://www.annesplace.net

"If something looks like a duck, walks like a duck, and talks like a duck ... chances are pretty good it is a duck." - Lois Lane; Strange Visitor From Another Planet

"You say potato, I say Vodka!" - Karen Walker; Hocus Focus

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#177480 - 04/10/02 05:51 PM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
MissyG Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 04/11/01
Posts: 655
Loc: Texas Hill Country, US
Whew!!!! Glad there wasn't any kryptonite in that knife!! Guess this little story proves that there is a fine line between love and hate... Glad Lois decided to finally fall on the "love" side of the lint, er... line!

You should wake up with ideas like this every morning!!

More soon!

Missy

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#177481 - 04/10/02 06:17 PM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
ShayneT Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 04/12/01
Posts: 355
I enjoyed this, Wendy. It had a tone that was a departure from your usual style, but it was an entertaining departure. The tone and the style and the story all worked well together. The story revealed a nicely understated sense of humor that made everything work together.

This was fun. Keep up the good work.

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#177482 - 04/10/02 06:19 PM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
Nan Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 04/12/01
Posts: 2652
Loc: In the Valley of the Sun
Now that was funny. Since when did you start writing comedy? More, please.

Nan
_________________________
When I get old, I don't want people thinking, "What a sweet little old lady." I want them to say, "Oh crap, what's she up to now?"

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#177483 - 04/10/02 06:31 PM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
Katie Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 04/11/01
Posts: 299
Loc: UK
ROTFL Wendy! I adore this! biggrin

I thought you said you couldn't do comedy? It's great! You should definitely try and write more comedy fic, you're good at it! With lots more killer remarks like these wink

Now, this remark had me clamping my hand over my mouth so I wouldn't make too much noise!

Quote:
Clark Kent was spawned by a leak from a toxic waste dump.

On Krypton.


That is funny! I can just picture Lois's face while she's thinking that.

But, this has to be my favourite:

Quote:
Clark Kent is a walking waste of oxygen. He's an animated lump of gangrene.


That has to be one of the funniest things I've read in a fic for a while! I loved it! I wished she'd have said that to Clark though, because that would have just been hilarious!

I want more of this kind of stuff, Wendy! It's great, and so much fun! Definitely cheered up a miserable day!

Katie smile

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#177484 - 04/10/02 08:00 PM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
Laurach Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 04/10/01
Posts: 3874
Loc: NY
Yes wendy this was a departure from your usual. very humorous! I loved it. Laura
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I don't do drugs. I get the same effect just standing up fast.

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#177485 - 04/10/02 09:48 PM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
shadowfax Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 02/16/02
Posts: 620
Loc: Metropolis
Shaggy Druggie??????? ROTFL!!!!

It was a hilarious story, Wendy, that became very sweet and WAFFy at the end. smile

The insults were funny - I laughed harder and harder at each successive contumely!

It gave just the right dramatic touch to have Clark run off at the crucial moment and leave Lois believing that he was avoiding her because she didn't hear about any Superman rescues. <img src="graemlins/happy.gif" border="0" alt="[Happy]" />

I loved it when Lois started talking to us near the end - I guess she's right: we are voyeurs. <g>

And the last line was sweet and funny. <img src="graemlins/happy.gif" border="0" alt="[Happy]" />

Lovely story! More soon, please!

Shadowfax
_________________________
Science: (n.) The attempt by subroutines in an operating system to deduce the source code, and write the instruction manual.

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#177486 - 04/10/02 11:00 PM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
ChiefPam Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 04/14/01
Posts: 1966
Loc: North Carolina, USA
Very fun, Wendy! <g> Very different than usual, too, but hey, that can be a good thing. I liked the look back at the events of the day, interspersed with furious commentary <g> and I could picture it all very clearly.

PJ
_________________________
...obsessing over Lois & Clark since 1995...

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#177487 - 04/10/02 11:14 PM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
Liz S. Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 04/12/01
Posts: 571
Loc: California
LOL, Wendy! I just loved this. This was so perfect. And the ending was great, with all the smooching.



blush
_________________________
Liz S
I've got to run before real life catches up to me!

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#177488 - 04/11/02 03:55 AM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
LexxLuthor Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 03/30/02
Posts: 728
Loc: Alt Florida Cluster
...a rusted bucket of bolts...!!!

That is what I was reminded of:: Dr. Smith's unsurpassed (until now) insults of the poor innocent Robot on Lost~in~Space. THANKS

Who does Scorched Earth better: Lois or Dr.Smith?
_________________________
lois (low'ess) verb (1) To move or go in a sneaky manner before capture. (2) One who loises. (3) An act of loising. --adjective. Stealthy, covert until caught.

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#177489 - 04/11/02 06:01 AM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
Kaethel Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 04/11/01
Posts: 717
Loc: France, European Union
ROTFL Wendy! Oh, this is just hilarious. <img src="graemlins/laugh.gif" border="0" alt="[Laugh]" /> I could hear Lois rant on an on all the way through, and I was giggling myself silly here. biggrin Loved the end, too, with the smoochie and her complaint against us voyeurs. goofy

Kaethel smile
_________________________
"Passion. It lies in all of us, sleeping, waiting, and though unwanted, unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws...and howl. It speaks to us, guides us. Passion rules us all and we obey. What other choice do we have? Passion is the source of our finest moments. The joy of love, the clarity of hatred...and the ecstasy of grief. It hurts sometimes more than we can bear. If we could live without passion, maybe we'd know some kind of peace, but we would be hollow; empty rooms, shuttered and dank. Without passion, we'd be truly dead."

Angelus ~ Passion (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)

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#177490 - 04/11/02 09:51 AM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
JoMarch Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 04/12/01
Posts: 64
ROTFL, Wendy! I loved it. smile

Loved the waffs, too, even if I was more grinning than awwwing. [g]

Very nice!!

JoMarch smile
_________________________
'I must do something' will always solve more problems than 'Something must be done'.

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#177491 - 04/11/02 03:32 PM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
Wendymr Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 04/11/01
Posts: 2147
Loc: Irish exile in the UK
Wow! What a lovely response! Thank you all!

This really was a piece of fluff, which I hesitated over posting at all - thank you, the afternoon #loisclark gang, for laughing at a couple of lines from it and persuading me that maybe it was worth doing something with. smile And again, many thanks to Phil, Missy and Carol, and to Paul too, for the insults; you were incredibly inventive and I'm just sorry that I couldn't use them all.

Given that comedy isn't something I find easy to write, it's lovely - and very encouraging - to get nice comments on the comedy in this - thank you to all of you who mentioned this aspect. Nan asked:

Quote:

Since when did you start writing comedy?


Well, I don't do it very often, but I have written some vaguely comedic stuff before: elements of Green Card, and my Cinder(Lois)Ellen fairy tale. But thank you!

Kaethel said:
Quote:
I could hear Lois rant on an on all the way through, and I was giggling myself silly here.


biggrin biggrin biggrin biggrin biggrin :

Katie - giggling mightily - said this:
Quote:

I thought you said you couldn't do comedy? It's great! You should definitely try and write more comedy fic, you're good at it! With lots more killer remarks like these


biggrin Thank you! But I must reiterate that most of the humour is in the insults, which were not mine to begin with. <g>

Shadowfax added:
Quote:

It gave just the right dramatic touch to have Clark run off at the crucial moment and leave Lois believing that he was avoiding her because she didn't hear about any Superman rescues.


Thank you! I was hoping that wouldn't be a step too far, but I tried to play it for laughs and not dramatic angst this time. wink

As for the ending...

Quote:

I really like the way you changed gears to make the reader be eavesdropping on them in the last half.


Quote:

I like how you did the first person talking to the reader.


Quote:

I loved it when Lois started talking to us near the end - I guess she's right: we are voyeurs. <g>


Quote:

Loved the end, too, with the smoochie and her complaint against us voyeurs.


Again, many thanks! I tried to "foreshadow' this slight shift earlier in the vignette, with Lois talking directly to the readers on several occasions. But it's really nice to know that it worked - I wanted to give Lois and Clark a happy ending, but wanted to do so without the usual exposition of argument/explanation/apology/resolution. This seemed to be the simplest way of getting a swift resolution. smile


Other comments which I appreciated very much:

Quote:

Whew!!!! Glad there wasn't any kryptonite in that knife!! Guess this little story proves that there is a fine line between love and hate... Glad Lois decided to finally fall on the "love" side of the lint, er... line!


ROFLMAO, Missy! And thank you muchly. wink

Quote:

The tone and the style and the story all worked well together. The story revealed a nicely understated sense of humor that made everything work together.


Thanks, Shayne. smile

Quote:

I liked the look back at the events of the day, interspersed with furious commentary <g> and I could picture it all very clearly.


Oh, yes!!! Thanks, Pam! This makes me very happy indeed. smile

Quote:

Who does Scorched Earth better: Lois or Dr.Smith?


LOL, Fortran! I've no idea who Dr Smith is, but I understand the sentiment of your comment, and thank you for it. smile

And Ann, thanks for reading this despite your dislike of first person!


Thanks again very much, Ann, TerriAnn, Karen, Missy, Anne, Shayne, Nan, Katie, Laura, Shadowfax, Pam, Liz, Fortran, Kaethel and Jo. I really appreciate you taking the time to respond.


Wendy smile

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#177492 - 04/11/02 04:47 PM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
i lv L&C Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 01/10/02
Posts: 453
Loc: England
hehe...this was so funny, i loved it, interesting list of insults as mentioned before - but nevertheless they were all very 'Lois'.
Well anyway thats just my two cents, nice work!

Antonia

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#177493 - 04/11/02 05:01 PM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
Supermom Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 04/09/01
Posts: 2694
Loc: Alabama, USA
Very cute, Wendy. And with all the extra insults provided by the gang on the ficlist, you had Lois in rare form. I liked the Shaggy Druggie too -- that sounds just like the way Lois would refer to him.

Don't sell your comedy short. We need comedy; after all -- laughter is the best medicine. biggrin
_________________________
Supermom
Writing is easy. I just open a vein and bleed. -- Red Smith

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#177494 - 04/11/02 06:09 PM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
Jill Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 04/13/01
Posts: 484
Loc: Cincinnati, Ohio, USA
Very funny, Wendy!! Very funny! If this is what we get from you when you're sleep-deprived, then you need to stay up late more often. <g>

I loved the insults, particularly "animated lump of gangrene"! <img src="graemlins/laugh.gif" border="0" alt="[Laugh]" /> ROFL!!!

I'm not usually a big fan of 1st person either, but this worked extremely well. I could just picture Lois ranting and all of her reactions....not to mention the final scene. <eg>

Quote:
And speaking of kissing... would you mind giving us some privacy here?!


Privacy? They want privacy? Hah! Fat chance! evil

Jill goofy
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I keep my ideals, because in spite of everything, I still believe that people are really good at heart. -Anne Frank-

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#177495 - 04/11/02 11:31 PM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
Thanatos Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 04/10/01
Posts: 308
Sorry i haven't posted earlier but I'm feeling brain dead today. I really liked this Wendy, it was funny and cute and even though I don't like first person or normally when the narrator or anyone int he story refers to the audience well it worked here wink . I'd like to see more like this wink .
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I've never felt so accepted in all my life. These people look deep within my soul and assign me a number based on the order in which I joined.

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#177496 - 04/12/02 05:01 PM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
merry Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 04/12/01
Posts: 2448
Very well done Wendy.
and very funny.
merry

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#177497 - 04/12/02 07:48 PM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
nerdgirl Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 04/12/01
Posts: 126
Loc: Lancaster Co, PA, USA
Hi Wendy!

I don't think the story is stupid in the least! I loved it! Those insults of Lois' were hilarious! The end was also funny! Lois kissing "pocket lint"--who knew? wink This was a cute story, and a joy to read. Please write more! smile


Have a tucked-in-tight day!

nerdgirl smile

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#177498 - 04/12/02 11:58 PM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
traceylynn Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 04/15/01
Posts: 151
Loc: Baltimore, Maryland, USA
Hey Wendy! Just wanted to say that I thought this was really cute, and I had a great time reading it smile

Thanks for sharing!

Tracey smile

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#177499 - 04/14/02 12:42 AM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
Kestrel73 Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 05/27/01
Posts: 1338
Loc: Singapore
LOL! Great insults, Wendy. And great story too.

Lote
_________________________
There are men who hate me;
Let me love them.
There are men I have wronged;
Let them forgive me.

- Saying of the Dinka Tribe

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#177500 - 04/22/02 01:52 PM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
Wendymr Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 04/11/01
Posts: 2147
Loc: Irish exile in the UK
I'm amazed and delighted that I need to come back and add further thanks for comments on this story. smile

Antonia, Marilyn, Jill, Adam, Merry, Nerdgirl, Tracey and Lote, thank you all very much indeed for your kind comments and compliments. I'm so glad that the humour worked for you. smile

Jill said:
Quote:

I'm not usually a big fan of 1st person either, but this worked extremely well. I could just picture Lois ranting and all of her reactions....not to mention the final scene. <eg>


Awww! Thank you! As for first person, have you never read Jane Eyre? Wonderful book! wink


Thanks again, guys. smile And if my Muse is ever so exercised again, I'll try not to debate so much before posting the result. goofy


Wendy smile

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#177501 - 04/22/02 01:58 PM Re: Comments: Pocket Lint
Bratling Offline
Lane and Kent

Registered: 04/01/02
Posts: 1561
Loc: SW Georgia, USA
Nice work Wendy! biggrin I was laughing hard enough that the entire computer lab was staring at me...more please?
_________________________
"And we shall exist by amusing ourselves, by dreaming of monstrous loves and fantastic universes, by complaining and quarreling with the pretenses of the world..."
--Arthur Rimbaud, The Flash of Lightning

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